We were in some sort of a van. It was long drive in to your village. We were meeting again after at least 4 years. Formative 4 years as I finished my secondary school years. I wasn't sure how you're gonna react. What I was supposed to say to you. How your kids were gonna react to me, us. Fear and apprehension about what was to happen was all that filled my mind during the ride which seemed to be never ending. But as we entered and you welcomed all of us in, I can't recall where all the fear flew to. It felt like how were used to be and time flew over dinner and the next thing I remember was you were sleeping beside us in the hotel bed before we had to part in the morning.





This scene kept replaying on my mind last night as I was trying to fall asleep. Began thinking of the times you were secretly tried to be angry with me for spending so much time outside home. When you tried to fight with me by not talking to me when I came back home past midnight. When you made sure I was home on my birthday. How you always want to be the first to wish me. How you were secretly jealous my friends saw more of me than you though you didn't always admit it. Remembered our one conversation when I was angry I couldn't get permission for something, you realised I never think twice before lying. I could see you wished things hadn't become such between us that I had to lie to her to get by. You don't approve of all I do but I still miss the fact that I don't have the person who would know even if my tears had dried up.