joie de vivre

posted : May 10, 2010

If there a few days in the calender that are overrated, Valentine's day would be the top in my list. Following that would be the god noes how many days to appreciate the mother, father, soon maybe dog, cat what not. Aiya, too overrated ready. Really hope I'm not being a spoilsport here or something. I mean it's not like I don't have important people in life that I don't want to cherish and treasure or what. It's just my important people in life would be treasured every single day, not specifically on particular hyped up days of the year. Plus the important people in my life don't really have official days in the calender like mother's day or father's day. So oh well. The whole world suddenly seemed to be posting messages on FB for publicity of their love yesterday. Profile pictures were changing. Argh. Too fake la please. Find a better way of showing your sudden love can.

So anyway to backtrack a bit, Saturday was a very eventful day. Amazing, I made it to forsaken AMK slightly before 9.30am and arrived at another god forsaken place, Chen Su Lan Methodist Home, before Ms. President. You still owe me a coke my friend. Charity work and volunteering was never really my cup of tea nor was I ever interested in those areas. The siblings have always been more forthcoming and more giving in these areas then me. But somehow I guess having been placed in such a situation, I just decided to give it my best and make those kids my priority for the half a day or so. Slightly over 4 hours actually. It was really tough in the beginning to get all of their attention and get them to listen to instructions. I mean even some 22 year olds find it hard to follow instructions, what more for these 10, 11 year old kids. But as time went on, I guess I just decided to make a little compromises here and there and work little agreements out with those kids to make a 'win-win' situation and make the best out of what I could. I reached home before 7 almost dead beat. Even the fact the parents were not in town for the night didn't even bring my energy level up by 1%. HAHA! Very surprising indeed! An eventful and meaningful Saturday indeed. Cheers to a very successful first event! Yay!

Yesterday was spent merely doing some retail therapy to escape the reality of internship starting. Did some cleaning of my wardrobe also. Cleaning is always therapeutic. Especially clearing out all the junk you wonder why you even bought it sometimes. I think shops should have this policy of allowing customers to rent clothes. Then maybe wardrobes won't get filled with weird clothes during the days your fashion sense becomes 'exotic' and you decide to shop. Haha.

I guess I'm no longer going to say things I don't mean for the sake of doing things and not hurting others. Cause I guess if I did wish you yesterday for the sake of it though I know you were expecting me to and wishing your dear son was here to make you feel oh-so-loved, you would have realized my words would be empty and carry no emotion with them. I guess I would never mean it even if I tried my best to cause you have not been a good mother to me over these recent years. You have not been a good mother to the sister. You fail to see the things right before your eyes. The things that are so blatantly calling out for you and your attention. Instead, you would rather believe in religion, god, prayers, rituals, healers. Screw them la. Fuck.

And if you were disappointed I didn't join in for prayers on Friday, worry not cause you are always in my thoughts and I want the best for you. Only the best cause in my eyes you were always the better achiever among us. The smart kid. Even if pursuing your childhood dream is not within sight, I would still want the best in any other field you choose for yourself. So latha, don't worry about all the people around you trying to decide things for you. Give your best shot for interview on Wednesday and we will see how things play out. Meanwhile, you will see a calling for what you want to do soon enough. I shall pray for that calling to hit you soon enough to help you decide. This I shall pray for. Rather than praying for misfortune not to hit and illness to go away. For you, I will and shall.

Shall remain optimistic about internship. Day 1, was a little draining considering this week entails the training by the only Solid Works expert nationwide. Awaiting Friday when he heads to the US and hopefully things would be a little slack. And hopefully next week, I get to head to schools to assist the secondary school students so that time would pass a little bit faster and things get a bit more fun. Hang in there! And miss me when I'm gone my faithful readers!

11:56 PM